Final reflection and thank you!

It’s Friday 30 April and I’m returning to Gravesend for a final debrief with Païvi from LV21 and Lucy from Quiet Down There to reflect on the Pull Up A Chair residency. I arrived early and before the meeting sat down to enjoy coffee and coffee cake outside Marie’s café. The first time I had been able to do this in Gravesham. As I sit and watch the town it’s lovely to say Hi to Graham, the town centre manager passing by, and overhear conversations between people bumping into each other for the first time. I had grand hopes of having all the blog posts written up and everything neatly tied up with a bow but well life, and other exciting projects happened, and I hadn’t quite finished everything. So I took this moment to read back through some notes I’d made after a mentoring session.

         

I was very grateful for the support of Tom, a coach and mentor who I had three sessions with over the course of the project. The last of these was two weeks after the residency had officially ended. Tom has lots of experience of community art making and is a brilliant listener, and skilled coach. He encouraged and supported me to slow down, ask questions and take notice. As someone who tends to gallop through life at 100 miles an hour this was really valuable. As part of the process of ending this project I gave myself six questions to think about. I’ve shared these, and my answers below. 

What did I learn or discover?

• There are ways to talk about and celebrate pride that are inclusive, generative and positive. I’d felt a bit icky about the theme at the start of the project but meeting people, and exploring pride with them has changed my relationship to the word and what it can mean.
• I think that inclusive, generative pride is rooted in care and connection.
• Social media can be a wonderful tool for community arts project and enable surprising connections. I’ve often shyed away from it, there are limits to its inclusiveness and it can be an unkind place. I’m going to try an include more considered and creative use of it in future work.
• I learned about my own process as a writer, and grew in confidence. Next step is to apply that!
• I got to develop the skill I have in connecting with people and encouraging them to share their stories. Something I love. 

What went well, what am I grateful for?

• The opportunity to undertake this residency at a point at which I think what I do, and want to do, is changing.
• The opportunity to do this residency at such a unique moment in history. To have the chance to connect with new people and learn about a place through such an extraordinary time.
• The trust, generosity and encouragement from Païvi, Lucy and pretty much everyone I met and chatted to. Humans can be so, so wonderful.
• Exploring a new place with a rich history.
• The chance to sit quietly next to water, and appreciate big horizons after a year spent largely in a small flat with no outdoor space.
• The chance to explore and hang out on LV21 – a beautiful ship and a wonderful arts and community space and organisation.
• The flexible approach to how the budget for the project was used that enabled me to do it, after a really hard year financially (like so many people in the arts)
• The support of Tom as a coach and mentor.

What could be improved?

• The initial financial offer to artists when the project was advertised. Although this project was a pilot, it wasn’t the most inclusive or accessible fee. I nearly didn’t apply because of that. Funding structures exist in the arts that actually create unpaid labour and low paid work. This excludes lots of people. It’s very difficult as an individual artist, and small arts organisations to challenge that. I’m glad that we had honest conversations about this in our final meeting.

What next – for me?

• I need some downtime. As a freelancer it’s a real discipline to take holiday, I hadn’t one for 9 months before the pandemic. Although I haven’t worked as much for the last year I’ve been volunteering, caring for family and friends, applying for work, budgeting hard and you know – living through a pandemic. I haven’t actually rested. I’m going to plan a holiday and rest.
• I want to make time to plan some projects that I lead. I’m often chasing work – I need to earn to survive – and then I get stuck in a cycle of being too busy to make the time to plan and fundraise for the work that I’d love to do. At the moment there still isn’t a huge amount of work around, I’m going to take advantage of this quieter moment to plan some of my own work (and still try to get a rest!)
• I’m going to write more – I really enjoy it.
• I want to learn more about Permaculture https://permacultureprinciples.com/, I’ve been thinking about how I can apply it to community arts project design and this residency has made me even more keen to do that.
• I want to build a more reflective creative practice – I’ll need to think about a support team, and how to afford to do this. I think it will benefit everyone I work with.

What next – project ideas inspired by my time in Gravesham?

• I have an idea for a project where people can thank others who supported the community during the pandemic. Almost everyone I spoke to talked about someone in their community who they wanted to recognise for their kindness and generosity during this time. There are so many stories of everyday kindness that should be celebrated. 
• There’s a project about chairs in community spaces – about taking the time to rest, and reflect and think in community.
• I’m fascinated by all the things you can see on the rooftops of Gravesend. A mish mash of a old and ultra-modern; antenna, radio masts, weathervanes, cupolas, finials and tourelles. I don’t know quite what the project is but I do know that this curiosity is always a good starting point for me.

So, my time in Gravesham on this project has come to an end. A huge thank you to everyone who took the time to chat with me, and who welcomed me so generously. Especially big thank yous to Païvi and Gary (and Tan Tan of course) and to Lauren.

I’ll be back on Saturday 5 June, 12 – 4pmish, by LV21 for the SILTings as part of the Estuary Festival. They’ll be lots to enjoy – do check it out. If it’s warm I’ll be in a white t-shirt with red lobsters on it, if it’s chilly I’ll be in the rainbow bobble hat that’s featured on this blog. It would be lovely if you’d like to stop by and say hello.